Confessions of a Black Thumb Gardener

Let’s talk about gardening, shall we? In this month’s feature, blooms and gardens take center stage. As you can tell by the popularity of garden clubs and the Cassina Garden Club’s annual Garden Walk, gardening is important to our local community. Most neighborhoods on the island are home to many amateur gardeners who put in hours of sweat to showcase beautiful lawns and yards. Ah, the joy of nurturing tiny green shoots, coaxing blooms from the soil, and basking in the satisfaction of a well-tended garden. Or at least, that’s how it goes for those blessed with the elusive “green thumb.” And then there’s me….

You see, I possess a special talent: an uncanny ability to inadvertently kill any plant that dares to cross my path. It’s not just a hobby; it’s a skill honed through years of dedicated neglect.

When I walk into ACE Garden Center, the plants see me coming and promptly start wilting and dropping their leaves. It’s as if they know their disastrous fate will be sealed the moment they find themselves in my care.

As for gardening tools? Well, let’s just say my gardening “arsenal” consists of one garden hose and one small trowel. I figure I can only do so much damage if all I’m able to do is water a plant and maybe move a little dirt. I have managed to keep a poinsettia plant alive since Christmas! That’s pretty good based on my black thumb history.

While St. Simons Island residents may marvel at the wonders of local gardens and thriving flora, there exists a special breed of gardener—the black thumbs of the world—like me, who use pine straw to cover just about every inch of their lawn to avoid gardening. Maybe I’ll invest in a cactus or two. After all, even black thumbs need a little greenery to remind us that where there’s life there’s still hope.

Confessions of a Black Thumb Gardener originally posted on by Elegant Island Living magazine.

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